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Kyle Steed

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I Guess I'm 34 Now

June 21, 2016

What happens that makes time seem so impossible yet so unbelievably beautiful?

I'm talking about the way my weeks fade into one another. One after the other. Like the constant crashing of the waves against the sand. Time has no concern for me whether I lay around and do nothing and binge watch Netflix or keep myself continuously busy working on something in my studio. No. Time has nothing to gain from me. It's like this giant invisible creature we're living inside, not yet realizing that we have been defeated and are left to decay inside the belly of the beast. A bit morbid, but hopefully you catch my drift.

There is no escaping time.

To say I feel another year older is just a nicer way to say that I've noticed my hairline receding ever so gracefully. I wonder when I'll give in and just buzz my head? The last year has been incredible though. I've been witness to the birth of our second daughter, Geny, and celebrated the second birthday of our first born, Savy. In between the moments when our girls are sleeping my wife and I have found time to laugh, love, drink a LOT of wine, travel, and practice the art of communication. My wife and I also celebrated our 10-year anniversary last December. A decade y'all. I can count on one hand the things I've done in my life for longer than ten years, one of those being alive. It's not easy being this awesome though.

Marriage is the greatest challenge we will ever face.

The thought recently occurred to me that it's of no surprise fewer people are getting married and more people are getting divorced today. We have access to so much with so little effort. Being married is the polar opposite. Sometimes it feels like you're giving all you have and you may not see a return on your time/energy for years to come. That's why for my wife and I our faith is so impactful and fruitful in our relationship. Otherwise, we could've been out of this thing years ago. But we've held on. Holding on to the hope that we were called together. The hope that when we pray things can actually change. I've seen some prayers take 2-3 years to be answered. My marriage has taught me to play the long game. Being in the moment is good and all, and reminds us to be present, but without raising our vision we can get overwhelmed by what's right in front of us.

Just Keep Swimming

With all that said though, if I've learned anything this year it comes from a little movie called "Finding Nemo". My daughter and I have watched it many an early morning. Without getting into all the nuances of the movie and what I've gained from watching it, there is one single line that is profound above all the rest; "Just Keep Swimming". It applies to all aspects of life. And it is with such simple wisdom that I continue on into my thirty-fifth year of life. I don't pretend to know where I'll be next year, but if the last ten years have taught me anything it's to expect something greater. That and to try and hold on to the moments in between.

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The views expressed here are my own and reflect my own personal thoughts, opinions and other random things that pop into my head. Thanks for reading.


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